Emma Atkinson

Phoenix Nights: The top 10 best moments

Decrease Font Size Increase Font Size Text Size Print This Page

Peter Kay fans rejoiced last week as it was revealed that there would be an ominous “announcement” surrounding comedy favourite Phoenix Nights, rumoured to be a return. So in preparation for this news, we’ve compiled a list of our top ten favourite moments from the hit comedy. Warning: some not safe for work content and language ahead!

10. The Auditions

At the end of every episode, these little auditions would show us (apparently) the best that Chorley had to offer in the way of entertainment. These people appear to be real acts too, performing in clubs like the Phoenix all over the country.

9. Half a Shilling

After working hard to reopen his club, Brian Potter (played by Peter Kay) books a seemingly harmless folk band named Half a Shilling, fronted by Tim Healey. The show is shambolic, however, after some racist undertones are noted by a visiting journalist.

8. Keith Lard

Peter Kay’s Keith Lard character has to be one of the funniest of the series – the bumbling fire safety officer has some questionable rumours around him – and he does more than enough to fuel the fire (if you’ll excuse the pun).

7. The Psychic

Clinton Baptiste comes highly recommended – by rival club owner Den Perry. However, his psychic revelations don’t go down too well with the audience.

6. Spencer for Hire

The wonderful Daniel Kitson plays young Spencer, who’s looking for a job behind the bar. As it transpires, he’s got plenty of experience. Sort of.

5. Max’s new car alarm

Bouncer Max has a new car alarm which he ordered from Armchair Super Store, the only channel that ever seems to be on in the club. The main draw of this alarm though, is that you can record your own personal message.

4. Max and Paddy’s sing-a-long

After the tragic closing of the Phoenix, the members are all required to take on new jobs. Bouncers Max and Paddy are seen driving around and singing – later revealed to be bussing around some Asian elders.

3. Jerry’s new job

Another of the jobs taken on by the staff of the Phoenix- for compere Jerry St Clair and keyboardist Alan, it’s a job as greeters in Asda, literally singing the praises of items like black bin bags and corned beef.

2. “Can you hear me now?”

One of the most quotable parts of the series – Max and Paddy are given new walkie talkie headsets, “headsets? Sets for your head?” and decide to test out the range of them.

1. Stars in their Eyes

The final episode of Phoenix Nights sees, once again, the Phoenix rising from the ashes. After rival Den Perry cancels the star act, the various characters of the club have to band together to put on their own version of Stars in their Eyes.

Hope you enjoyed our round-up of the best moments in Phoenix Nights. We couldn’t include everything, but let us know what your favourite moments are – or whether you think our list was total rubbish.